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Fifteen important things for women over fifty | Pilgrim's Moon

Fifteen important things for women over fifty

Women laughing

I was amused by a recent article in HuffPost titled 15 Things a Woman Over 50 Should Own. It inspired me to make a similar list, starting with two from HuffPost with which I thoroughly agree. But although there are some material things to “own” in my list, the emphasis is slightly different:

  1. A room of one’s own
  2. A good bra, professionally fitted
  3. Plenty of laughter lines around the eyes
  4. Two or three really close friends
  5. A supply of good books
  6. A way of expressing creativity
  7. A really comfortable bed
  8. An open mind
  9. Quiet time to think
  10. Delicious, nutritious  food
  11. Dreams (still dreamin’ after all these years…)
  12. Love
  13. Good quality cotton bedlinen and fluffy towels
  14. A ‘right fit‘ spiritual practice
  15. A sense of mischief

So those are my ideas? What about you, what would you add to the list?

Photo credit: The Arches

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19 Responses to Fifteen important things for women over fifty
  1. Sarah Whitworth
    October 13, 2013 | 5:54 pm

    Hooray for this new post, Tess! I too thoroughly agree with #1 and #2 on your list. On that second one, when I was young, I was rather flat-chested, even used padded bras to appear half-way normal. Now, it’s the opposite, here I am looking like Sophia Loren, though only in that area, unfortunately.

    I support all 15 points you’ve suggested. What I need as well, this is true, is a blog like Pilgrim’s Moon (add that to your list, please). I have older women friends, so I can’t complain, but still, aging isn’t something any of these ladies wants to discuss in any detail. Yes, that’s good on the one hand, and I understand, and it’s a relief to ignore it, but some discussion would be helpful!!!! One more thing, I’d suggest, how about “an enjoyable place to take long walks.” It’s a refreshing, natural way to exercise, and it airs out the fretting of the mind as well.

    • Tess Giles Marshall
      October 13, 2013 | 5:59 pm

      Thank you Sarah – and one thing that is interesting to discuss is the way we change shape as we grow older, whether on the top or elsewhere!
      Thank you for your comment on PM, and I completely agree about taking long walks – you must enjoy the Highline for that!

  2. claire
    October 13, 2013 | 8:41 pm

    Like Sarah, I’m thrilled you’re back :-)
    I like all 15 points, and particularly #9. I would add ‘contact with Nature’ (as in Sarah’s long walks) and ‘learning to inhabit my body’, to accept it as it is (very hard for me), to remind it (and myself) that I love it.
    Blessings.
    claire recently posted..ThinkingMy Profile

    • Tess Giles Marshall
      October 13, 2013 | 9:02 pm

      Thank you claire. Isn’t it interesting, how hard we find it to think of our bodies as part of us?

  3. wol
    October 13, 2013 | 10:21 pm

    I heartily agree with all of them except for #2 I would substitute: “Good quality, comfortable clothes and shoes that fit well and which are appropriate to where and how you live.” As for the bra thing, IMHO, women should only have to wear bras for the same reason and under the same circumstances that men have to wear jock straps/athletic supporters. LOL! Can you tell bras are not my favorite article of clothing? ( http://9gag.com/gag/aOqzjjR ) But I do very much agree that if you are going to wear one, it should be one that is professionally fitted.
    I also agree with Sarah W above, and would add to her suggestion that it be a ***safe*** comfortable place to take long walks — and make it a place that would contain green space with paths and offer the option of a very large paved maze/labyrinth to walk. Walking mazes/labyrinths is such a meditative thing.
    wol recently posted..It’s MysteriousMy Profile

    • Tess Giles Marshall
      October 23, 2013 | 8:07 pm

      Also agree with the clothing, especially the well-fitting shoes – I do have trouble with getting my feet comfortable. I hear what you’re saying on bras! But being rather, ahem, well-endowed I’m much more comfy with than without!

  4. Jane
    October 14, 2013 | 2:19 am

    A good sense of humor! I have a card that my dad sent me ages ago (when he was probably in his late 70′s) that says “Blessed are those who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.” I think being able to find the humor in life gets even more important as we age. It usually means we’ve relaxed our stranglehold on how things “ought” to be and learned to accept what is with grace. I love Anne Lamott’s line, “Laughter is carbonated holiness.”

  5. Nancy B.
    October 14, 2013 | 2:52 am

    I would add, some form of pro-social activity beyond donating–volunteering, mentoring, writing letters and so on. It’s probably all to the good if it makes one slightly uncomfortable, requiring the practice of equanimity. Overall, I think Tess’s is a good list.

    • Tess Giles Marshall
      October 23, 2013 | 8:09 pm

      Really good point, Nancy, about something that makes us slightly uncomfortable!

  6. Barbara Anne
    October 14, 2013 | 7:14 pm

    Good topic!

    I’d add music to dance to (Mama Mia!), to sing with, and to help you feel tranquil. Include seasonal music. The exuberence of Mannheim Steamroller’s early Christmas CDs do it for me like nothing else.

    IMHO, your #6 is immensely important whether you finger paint, write, sew, cook, sing, or whatever, you need to celebrate your delight in something you do or make.

    Hugs!

    • Tess Giles Marshall
      October 23, 2013 | 8:11 pm

      Your quilting was one of many art forms in my mind when I included number 6 – even before your beautiful gift dropped through my letterbox! :) And yes, Mama Mia is fab.

  7. Mary Lunnen
    October 14, 2013 | 8:15 pm

    I love your list, and one point that stands out is number 4 ‘two or three really close friends’. I am blessed with a number of close friends, real friends and count myself so fortunate in this. And they help me laugh at myself too.

    • Tess Giles Marshall
      October 23, 2013 | 8:13 pm

      Mary, completely agree. There’s a kind of sense of combined relaxation and challenge with really good friends, who can say things which would make me feel very prickly if someone else did.

  8. Andrea
    October 15, 2013 | 4:30 am

    I’m delighted to have just discovered your refreshing blog! I love your list. I would add:
    1.Daily stretching 2.A good haircut complete with shampoo and head rub.
    Blessings, Andrea

    • Tess Giles Marshall
      October 23, 2013 | 8:14 pm

      Andrea, a warm welcome! Yes I agree. I currently have the luxury of going to a hairdresser who does an excellent head rub – bliss!

  9. Alison at Diamond-Cut Life
    November 4, 2013 | 2:49 pm

    TESS!! How have I missed the fact that you are now actively posting again?!?!?!?! I know I “liked” your Facebook page some time ago. Very sorry to have not been dropping by to join your recent discussions.

    OK, the things I would add to this list would include:
    – steady engagement with one or more causes greater than yourself. (For me, at 53, these would be climate change activism and feeding the hungry.)
    – a relationship with nature.
    – physical activity that makes us feel vital and anchors us in our bodies.

    That’s my two cents. So glad you are posting again. Your writing is a form of nutrition.
    Alison at Diamond-Cut Life recently posted..Review And Giveaway of “I Am Malala”My Profile

    • Tess Giles Marshall
      November 4, 2013 | 8:16 pm

      Thank you Alison! And yes, those are wonderful additions to the list – many more than two cents’ worth!